You’ll cry and cry the whole night through. Your cheating heart will tell on you. ~ Hank Williams
Do you suspect your woman is cheating? Unfortunately, where there is smoke there is usually fire, and women have affairs just like men, although statistically the rate of affairs is much higher among men.
Currently, new studies indicate that between 35% and 40% of all wives cheat on husbands while the statistics for men are between 40% and 50%. A relationship cannot survive without trust and nothing destroys that bond more corrosively than infidelity. If your woman is cheating, as painful as it is, you must face the facts and deal with them. Check out some warning signs below.
Many affairs begin at work and could be between an employee, boss, consultant or client. When your lady leaves for work, think about the following: Is she spending more time taking care of herself to look nice at work? Is she leaving the house earlier than usual? Does she stay later and take more business trips? These are all reasons to be suspicious, although by themselves they prove nothing. It is the collective signs that complete the picture.
Has her behavior changed from her usual pattern? Is she becoming preoccupied with changing her hair-style or color and shopping for more revealing clothes? Is she more interested in other things when it comes time to go to bed?
Has your lady recently taken up a new sport or activity? Again, by itself this indicates nothing, but as part of a puzzle, it may be a piece that fits into a bigger and more unpleasant picture.
Has your woman become more secretive about taking phone calls receiving mail etc? Are there more calls than usual coming in on her cell phone? Does she lower her voice or find some excuse to leave the room when she speaks into the phone?
It is up to you to face all the facts squarely in the eye and put all of these pieces together, because if you confront your cheating partner, she will deny everything and you may have lost an important edge over the situation.
If she doesn’t think you suspect her, it might be easier to trip her up even though that kind of winning is hardly a desirable victory. Check her computer and which sites she is visiting, obtain (by hook or by crook) her cell phone records and ferret out unfamiliar numbers. You may even have to follow her to find the answers you need, but this should only be done as a last resort.
While the last thing you may want to do is follow your lady around, you may need to do so in order to discover the truth. It takes courage to do this and can be very difficult, but you owe it to yourself (and children, if they are involved).
Hiring a private detective can be very expensive and if you have the time you can actually set up surveillance on your own. If you believe your lady receives a male visitor at your home you can set up a miniature, hidden camera. You can also purchase software that can monitor her computer activity.
Finding out the answer is only the beginning of a long and heartbreaking road ahead. Where do you go as a couple from there? For some, the path will lead to healing and recovery, and for others someplace else. Whatever caused the affair has to be addressed and your woman must understand that betrayal cannot be easily forgiven and she must acknowledge the pain she has caused you before any healing can even begin.
Restoring trust is difficult and sometimes the damage is too severe to repair. Whatever action you choose to take, be strong and follow through. Like that old saying, it is the truth and only the truth that can set you free.
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